Dear Liberty – I just spent the whole afternoon reading your website. My cousin has been talking about you and your books for a couple of years now, but to me, you were one more name with one more formula. I have had marriages that would each make a soap opera. I have spent my entire adult life praying word of faith formula prayers, studying the Bible, cross-referencing and using every Bible aid I could find, and listening to entire teaching tape libraries from various well-know ministries. I became a Christian at a young age after some serious things happened to me, and I have searched for healing and answers my entire adult life. What I want to know is why does it always fall upon me to enter into warfare for these sick husbands I’ve had? I cannot count the thousands upon thousands of hours I have spent (after being instructed to do so) praying “prayers of authority” and binding of this and that demon.I am exhausted with always doing all the praying over some sick husband who is out of line and full of rebellion. It feels as though not only are we to be these all-loving women of God, but we are supposed to have never ending supplies of patience and grace to pray for sin-sick husbands, too. It is just too exhausting! I’m sorry that I’ve had learn the hard way on a lot of these so-called faith-formulas of prayer and declaration that place demands on God and give Satan orders. These prayer-formulas made me very sad, because it always seemed so arrogant to demand such things from the Father that I love so much.
I never thought it was too much just to be loved, but it seems it is. Why is it on my shoulders to always pick up the entire load when God says let every man (and woman) work out their own salvation with fear and trembling? I’m trembling, all right, because I need to know when do we ever come out on the other side and just get to rest? When do we finally get to be with a person who is not such a mess that he needs his poor wife to do all this for him? I know Eve bit the apple, but when is it ever enough for a woman? I need to hear something from God on this, so please put my request into your war room. I am so tired.
Liberty’s Answer – I’m not sure you are going to want to hear what I am going to say, but please read all the way through this answer. I believe that you have repeatedly chosen damaged men to try and fix through your efforts and prayers. This would give some kind of validation to your damaged sense of worth–in your soul–because it feels it has been invalidated of any worth because of what has happened to you. God has not put it upon you to bear the load of these men, you have chosen these men and you have chosen to be their “savior.” You have chosen to do this because of your need to be the praying, caring, loving Christian wife who can save them. That’s the limit of any “counseling” I will put forth.
Now, on to the good part. The message God has given me teaches you how to use the binding and loosing prayer principles–application guaranteed to be available to you through multiple sample prayers in the books. This message is not an abstract principle where you have to have enough faith, because wounded people sometimes fail at faith because of their ongoing pain. These prayer principles give you a means of steadying yourself through the binding prayers (like putting on a seat belt or a safety harness) so that you can use the loosing prayers to actually perform a form of self-surgery on your soul to begin to release its toxic waste. These prayer principles give you a means of stripping the lies, the deceptions, the guilt, the effects and influences of wrong agreements, and words curses (among other devastating things your soul accumulates as things have happened to you) out of your soul by loosing them.
These prayers are most effective with an amount of faith working with them, but they are also very effective to strip away the toxic waste that keeps you from developing true faith. True faith is trust and confidence in the goodness of God towards you. This stripping out allows such faith to regrow and regroup. These prayers do not remove God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit out of the healing process of your life–they help you get rid of your soul’s baggage that has prevented you from cooperating with this divine healing process.
I urge you to read Shattering Your Strongholds carefully, praying the prayers on pages 131 and 139 every day. Then go on to Breaking the Power, reading it carefully. Pray the prayer that begins on page 30 every day for 30 days, the Breaking Your Own Soul Power prayer. I think you will also find something in many of the prayers in BTP that you may want to incorporate into your daily prayers. The whole focus and purpose of these prayers is to dismantle your soul’s self-defense mechanisms and get the strongholds out of the way so that God can get into your deepest hurts and needs and fix you. He won’t force His way into these areas because that would be violation of your soul. He needs you to cooperate with Him and take down the self-defense mechanisms that your soul has put in place and then invite Him into places your soul have kept Him out of before.
I think you need to back off on your urgent prayers for your husband. God has heard them, He knows the situation, and He is ready to take on the responsibility for your husband that you have refused to relinquish to Him. Trust your husband to the only One who can deal with him and save him, and leave the details to God. You need to focus effective prayers on yourself right now. You need to cooperate with God’s healing process by getting (loosing) the deception and denial out of your own soul. As you create room within your soul to hear God and receive His truth, He will instruct you on what to do. He will begin to work mightily in your situation as soon as you begin to turn all of this over to Him. I will be praying with you.